Audience Member Comments

"Slow down, use a condom, and I am not done yet!"

"You were great! I'm glad medical school taught you well!"

"You're pretty good for a chubby guy!"

"He's married to my best friend now. It's cool though - he looks like Screech from Saved by the Bell."

"Thanks. After growing up Fundamentalist, I really needed that!"

"I'm sorry I made you think I was 'preggers' that April Fool's Day."

"Size does matter, not just the motion of the ocean, cause it takes a hell of a long time to get to England in a row boat."

"No I don't like it when you spank me."

"I'm glad I don't have to see you anymore and no, I will not explain why we broke up again. Also, you're not as attractive as I remember."

"I wish immigration hadn't sent you home."

"The cops are here - put your clothes on!"

"My therapist would like to have a word with you."

"I wish I had waited for someone hotter!"

"Thanks for trying it and only charging me $5!"

"Why didn't you ask for my number afterwards?"

"Thanks for ruining my prom, you slut!"

"There's something I have to tell you . . . "

"Wanna come over after the show and look at my collection of Jackie Chan DVD's"

"Can I have my virginity back?"

"I married him . . . divorced him . . . need I say more?"

"Remember when my mom walked in?"

"By the way, after we had sex I realized that, yeah, I was gay."

"Where are my Depeche Mode CD's?"

"Give me back the money you owe me from the loan I cosigned for you!"

"I'm a lesbian now . . . thanks!"

"Why did you steal my rent money? You said you loved me!"